I will not die an unlived life I will not live in fear of falling Or of catching fire I choose to inhabit my days To allow my living to open me Making me less afraid More accessible To loosen my heart So that it becomes a wing, a torch, a promise I choose to risk my significance. To live so that that which comes to me as seed Goes to the next as blossom And that which comes to me as blossom Goes on as fruit. --Donna Markova

Friday, April 01, 2005

TGIF

So I had coffee w/ Cole yesterday. He called me to figure out what to do Sunday afternoon and I was walking on State avoiding doing work and he happened to be studying at Starbucks so I stopped by and we had coffee. And he’s cool, but we’d def. just be friends b/c…1) we both talk too much so we would just talk at each other, 2) (more importantly) he had that whole “I’m right and close-minded” thing going on, and 3) I think the reason we meshed well on Wed was b/c I was having a bad day and he got to play benevolent rescuer…I think he’s one of those guys who needs to be the rescuer ALL THE TIME…thanks but no thanks. Anyway, so we’re not doing anything on Sunday…that sounds like I was mean or something and blew him off, but I think he could tell too by the end of our conversation that 1) I wasn’t giving him the right signals, and 2) we weren’t going to click that way really. Hate it when cute guys have unattractive personalities. That sounds mean…he wasn’t a bad guy, just not the oh-so-clichéd “my type.” Okay, done w/ that subject.

On a completely different note—I tied it up w/ the Ingram stairs last night (even though I accidentally cut my sets short by one b/c I can’t count). Saturday I’ll kill them. I discovered I like running the stairs better at night (although you run the risk of killing yourself b/c they’re not well-lit) so that’ll probably be the plan from here on out—or maybe keep changing it up. Other revelation of the evening—Irish music is great to run stairs to. I’ve always been listening to this inspirational music, but I listened to Flogging Molly last night and that was crazy great. Current favorite song—What’s Left of the Flag.

I’m excited about this weekend…not sure why, but I am. We’re watching Titanic tonight around 10 (okay, probably later in reality) if anyone wants to join us. Then tomorrow I’ve got CPR/First Aid training all day (I think I have to be there at like 8 or something crazy like that), then out dancing w/ Uma and the girls (where, I have not idea—not in charge of that one). Then Sunday morning I’ve got church, then brunch = waffles at Frank’s, then library to study for my econ exam, then Econ review session at 7…lifting somewhere in there…overall, a good weekend, I’m thinking. We’ll see, right? Nothing can go that wrong b/c it’s spring and I have awesome friends.

I have to go talk to a business school advisor on Monday and get him to say that I can 1) take AIS 211 abroad and it’ll count for my prereqs for my later AIS courses here, and 2) I can take AIS 301 and AIS 620 concurrently instead of consecutively. And then I won’t have to take summer school! So I can go to the ranch, find an internship, or work somewhere else...if I'm not at the ranch I can go to country USA w/ cool wisconsin boys! Yay! My friends rock!

Okay, off now for doing nothing this afternoon...no plants till 7 at the earliest, 10 at the latest so if you want to hang out between now and then, IM me or something 'cause I'm just chillin'.

Thursday, March 31, 2005

Boy Free

Yeah, so I ended up having coffee w/ Cole this afternoon. For like two hours. And it was fun--he's hillarious. And he's cute. And we clicked really well. As friends. I figured out that he wasn't really my type personality-wise after all. Not sure why. Maybe b/c he talks as much as me. Yeah, that doesn't work so well b/c I think we'd just talk at each other. Anyway, I don't have time to go into it at the moment, but I'll surely drag out and over-analyze the whole thing later. Suffice to say, I'm boy-free at the moment. The pros and cons of which about balance themselves out so that's fine. Anyway, gotta run and reach some fascinating (notice the sarcasm) psychology right now. And listen to Flogging Molly--which rocks...

Then the rosary beads count them one, two, three
Fell apart as they hit the floor
In our garb of black we must pay respect
To the colour we're born to mourn
Walk away me boys, walk away me boys
And by mornin' we'll be free
Wipe that golden tear from your mother dear
And raise what's left of the flag for me

Wednesday, March 30, 2005

Terrible, horrible, very-bad day. But it's getting better b/c the weather is cool.

And I met a guy. He's pretty cool. We're going to do something this Sunday afternoon...maybe go bowling. He said he'd figure it out. Oh...this isn't the guy I asked out before. That didnt' work out. I mean...the moment passed or whatever. I met this guy (his name is Cole, by the way--I don't know why I'm not referring to him by name) at the business school library this afternoon while I was freaking out trying to get my Coventry application done and mailed on time. And I was in a bad mood. And I was definitely doing the whole grungy thing. And we hit it off anyway. He's a business major (finance or marketing, I can't remember which), a junior, he went to Scotland last year to study abroad, and...that's about as far as we got. So hopefully he's not a serial killer. Cause he was cute AND funny...wait, am I dreaming? Oh, nope...pinched myself...I'm awake. So that makes the day a little better. Think about how excited I normally would be at suddenly having a sunday afternoon "date" w/ a cute guy...then imagine how bad my day had to be that I'm only marginally excited. Oh well, I'll be excited tomorrow.

Maybe

Katie

Tuesday, March 29, 2005

Conversations

Okay...how do ppl do it? Have conversations, I mean. If you know me you know I could carry on a conversation w/ myself for about three days before I'd realize the other person fell asleep or somehting (that's not a good thing), but I still think sometimes when I start talking to someone that we won't be able to find enough stuff to talk about. Which is kind of silly in and of itself, but human nature I suspect. But, my big question is for all the rest of you normal ppl who don't talk at about 90 miles an hour. What do all the quiet ppl talk about? Just a thought.

Avoiding doing my hmwk right now...it feels pretty good.

So I think you're never really friends w/ a guy until you could tell him you like him, he can say he doesn't see you that way, and you can still be just a good friends afterwards. And vice versa. That's for Nick--you're her rock and if she lets it screw up your friendship...well, that would suck. But I think you should go for it anyway b/c it's hard to grow as friends when one of you is lying about who you are to the other. And that's what you'd be doing. So there's my two cents.

On to other topics: The Ingram stairs kicked my butt today...that's what I get for taking a week off...so as it stands:
Ingram stairs: 1
Katie: 0
But I'm gonna tie it up on Thursday and vengeance shall be mine on Saturday...so watch out!

I'm getting sick of country b/c I've ODed on it lately...so I'm changin' it up. If anyone has good musical suggestions, drop me a line. My itunes is freakin' out so it's hard to get stuff. Listening to Flogging Molly (thanks Nick) right now...it's interesting...I never really love any music until I know the lyrics by heart.

Okay, I'm going to go paint my toenails, read my psych book and talk to ppl (if any happen to be in the den)...all at the same time...oh yeah, that's multitasking baby.

Katie

IM

Okay, so I'm a compulsive away message checker on IM. And there's a facebook group for that! And there are like 388 ppl in that group. So I'm not a freak.

Okay, this one is a little different. Does anyone else have the compulsive need to be the first one to leave a conversation on IM? I mean, it's freaky...I'll talk to ppl for like 15/20 minutes and then leave...for no reason...and we're not necessarily out of things to talk about or anything like that. I don't know...it's a sickness.

Where is the sun today? It's hot but it's windy and there's no sun...not ideal studying-outside conditions. Sad. Okay, off to hit the books...today is going to be a great day.

Katie

Monday, March 28, 2005

Is it so small a thing
To have enjoy'd the sun,
To have lived light in the spring,
To have loved, to have thought, to have done?
--Matthew Arnold (1822-1888) English poet

One word to describe today: sublime

It's friggin' GORGEOUS outside. Man, how the sun magically removes stress, I'll never know nor fully appreciate. I love spring!

Sunday, March 27, 2005

A Beautiful Sunday Night

Happy to be home. Like crazy, cartwheel, I-missed-all-of-you-so-much, lets go spin around outside and stare up at the stars until we're dizzy and fall down and feel the earth spin while we laugh like maniacs happy. So I'm going to do homework now...yay (note the sarcasm). But...I'm in too good of a mood to let even hmwk bring me down. Looking forward to this crazy, test-prep week like the nerd that I am.

The bus was productive--no, really, I swear! Quality time w/ Hyeck.

Got my Blackhawk Greatest Hits CD so that's solace for the hmwk time.

Freakin' excited about going to the NAT tomorrow--I missed the gym! Another sign of geekdom? I don't know.

Off to the races, Katie

Back to the Big City...yeah, 'cause I'm coming from Mpls to Madison

Hey all. I can't wait to get home tonight! Well, it'll be like 9:30 or 10, so there won't be much left of my Sunday night, but I'm excited anyway. I hope it rains while we're on the bus--I love riding in the rain. I need to write my application essay to Warwick by Tuesday so that's probably what I'll do tonight (I was going to do it on the bus, but I know I won't...). Spent 6 hours yesterday doing Econ and Accounting, but it was worth it to get a head-start on what is going to be a crazy two weeks.

I love college. I know I'm going to be stuyding hard core for the next two weeks, but that's okay b/c I know I won't get anything done on the weekend nights so it's not like I'll be a complete recluse or anything.

Anyway, gotta go get ready for church--I love easter.

Katie